One Month Old

Caitlin,

You are one month old today.  Your daddy and I can hardly believe that you have already been with us for a month!  The first weeks that you were home you were a sleepy baby, but during these last couple weeks, you are starting to be more alert and awake a little more often.  Most days, you'll eat about every 2-3 hours and stay awake for a little while and then nap for 1-2 hours.  If we would let you, you would sleep on one of our chests all day.  This is the spot where you are most comfortable.  You have taken a few naps with me like this. Don't tell Daddy, but I think he secretly loves to let you nap on his chest (this is evidenced by the number of pictures that I have of you sleeping on him!). I know I love it when you fall asleep on my chest or in my arms.  I wouldn't trade these times with you for anything because I know that someday you will be pushing me away and telling me that I embarrass you.  The last couple of days, you have started to get really fussy in the evenings, and we are still trying to learn what your cries mean.  You have this really pitiful cry that breaks my heart everytime I hear it, and when you get really mad, you've started crying so hard that it seems like you are going to stop breathing.  Your little face gets really red, and it scares me because I think you aren't going to breathe again.  I think you just like to make Mommy worry, and if there is something for me to worry about little or big, I will find it.  I think we know the hungry cry, but other than that, your daddy and I are clueless.  By the time we think we have you figured out, you go and change things on us!  For the most part, you are a relatively good sleeper at night.  You usually sleep for a long stretch of about 3-4 hours (remember, it's all relative) and then wake up every 2 hours after that.  Last night, we really struggled to calm you down and get you to fall asleep, but once you did, you slept for 3 hour stretches.  I would love for you to keep doing this (or even start sleeping for 4-5 hours at a time!).  Just like your daddy, you are not exactly a morning person.  You need to stretch a lot, and it takes you a while to actually wake up.  It's fun to watch you trying to convince yourself that it's time to wake up - you make a lot of funny faces.  You love to eat, but we are having some problems with breastfeeding.  We went to visit a lactation consultant and she thinks that you might be slightly tongue-tied and that is what is causing the problems.  You are still a good eater, but you aren't doing it properly, so you are causing Mommy a lot of pain.  We have an appointment with an ear, nose and throat doctor this week to see if it makes sense to fix this problem.  For now, I just grin and bear it because I know how important it is for you to eat, and I am not ready to give up breastfeeding just yet.  Before you were born, I was really apprehensive about nursing you, but now that you are here, the apprehension is completely gone.  As much as I complain about it (and about 90% of the reason I complain is because of the pain), it is our special time together and I don't want to give it up (plus, formula is really expensive!).  Bathtime is really traumatic for you.  Sometimes, we think that you're going to like it, but most of the time, you just scream through it.  We try to limit tramautizing you as much as possible unless you make a huge mess, so you are getting a bath about every third day.  We are still working on tummy time, and have tried the swing and bouncy seat more often this week as you finally seem like you're big enough for them.  Both the swing and bouncy seat are kind of hit or miss.  Some days you tolerate them, but others you scream as soon as we strap you in.  You are great in the car.  Most times, once we put you in the carseat, you cry, but by the time we're at the stop sign in our neighborhood, you have stopped and are asleep.  You also love the stroller.  I took you to the mall yesterday, and you slept the whole time we were there. 

You make us happier than we could have ever imagined.  Every day is a new adventure for us. You certainly keep us on our toes, but the past month has been better than all the months of our lives combined.  You have taught us what it's like to love unconditionally (even when you're crying or have spit up all over us or have a huge blowout diaper in the middle of the Annapolis Mall), and we cannot wait to see what the next month holds and how much you'll change and grow! 

Love you like no other,

Mommy

Here are your one month pictures with your new teddy bear!

And for comparison, here you are at zero months (four days old):